This is an apology

to my three year old child. You see, all of the women in my family have naturally curly hair, except for my mum who somehow managed to escape it. Until recent generations, the male children had all been pretty lucky. A couple had wavy hair but there were none who had outright curls.

Curls are pretty. People spend a lot of money trying to get those perfect, springy, bouncy curls that you see in the ads on the telly for shampoo. They go to salons and endure the torture of stinky chemicals and dryer machines that appear to be sucking the brains out the top of your head.

Curls are gorgeous. From what I understand, curls seem to be even more endearing on a male than on a female. Here is the thing, there is a downside to having curls. This is what may be referred to as the poodle with a paw in the light socket effect. One should be cautious at all times not to brush the curls once they are dry. Spend thousands per month trying to tame them, spend hours every day winding them into just the right behavior but for heaven’s sake:

Never, Ever brush them when they are dry. I am so sorry

sweet child, I have learned my lesson. I should have known

this from my own hair.

With any luck he will speak to me again by the time he is 18.

 

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72 thoughts on “This is an apology

  1. Reblogged this on Wyndy Dee and commented:
    Hahaha! We too have naturally curly hair, though mine is very coarse auburn hair…and my daughter has beautiful curls, soft and bouncy and yet she spends hours flat ironing! I think his hair is cute! Just sayin’

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  2. Hey! In the 60s, that would have been an enviable badge of distinction. Worried about him not speaking? Any luck, that’ll kick in with puberty and wear off at the projected age of 18…19 if you’re lucky.

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  3. This is too funny! I have really thick. curly hair too and I know what you mean about brushing it when dry. I look like the Sphinx if I do that. Growing up before the advent of the oh so glorious flat iron, I spent many, many years with my hair in tight braids. When I had it in a ponytail, my friends would inevitably stick little wads of paper in the giant bush that was attached to the back of my head and I would spend all day like that oblivious to the fact that I was carrying a miniature collection around.

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    • Oh yes! I have been there! I recall the first time I went back to the ocean after living in the desert for a few years. Two hours after arriving my hair fluffed out into an Afro the Dennis Rodman would have been proud of. πŸ˜‰

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  4. I, too, have thick naturally curly hair. It is both a curse and a blessing. I learned the hard way how to properly care for it, and I have a feeling I’ll be writing a blog of apology to my 11 year old daughter pretty soon, as her hair is just starting to curl…

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  5. XD Get him some garnier f. curl shaping gel. it doesn’t make your hair stiff or sticky, just super shiny and non-frizzy. can be applied to wet or dry hair to fix curls :3 I have naturally curly hair too that frustrates me, and it seemed to be the only thing that helped πŸ˜€ I also use it on my 9 year old to save her poor blonde curls from traumatizing her.

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  6. I know what that’s all about, my youngest was born with curls…that got even curlier with puberty for some strange reason…he used to wear a pony tale…until they called it his poodle tail. Now he cuts it short.

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  7. This is hilarious! My grandfather is the only other person in my family with curly hair and my mother spent years torturing me with a brush before we finally figured out how to manage curly hair the right way! There are so many pictures of me that just look like a small head floating in a thick brown cloud haha…I should find those. And burn them.

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    • Ha! Absolutely. I can honestly say I feel your pain. I have a picture somewhere of me standing next to a standard sized poodle, and You can barely tell where my hair ends and the dog begins. Oy.

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  8. I was only a young 5 year and my mom let me take pictures with my hair sticking up, cut teribly and the liek. Just so you know this will haunt you forever as I am still bitter at my mom (or mum as you call them) for this.

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  9. Have you seen pictures of my grandson? Between the naturally curly hair from my daughter’s side and being half African-American, the kid doesn’t stand a chance. I try to just never ever touch it. It can’t really even be combed out when it is wet, dry is impossible.

    Hide the pictures for blackmail when he is a teenager πŸ™‚

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  10. Hilarious! My daughter has straight hair (like me) and what do we do? Curl it into ringlets before school every morning. She won’t even let me run my fingers through the curls to separate them. Seems we always want what we don’t have πŸ™‚

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  11. Personally I LOVE curls, on girls and boys. I’ll admit I hate when mother’s straighten or shave their boys’ heads because of it, but I keep my peace. My hair is also wavy and I only learned within the past several years to not brush it when dry. I don’t get the poof effect (then again, my hair’s long), but it looks terrible! I actually use a nice curling cream or texturing paste when my hair’s dampish wet, so the waves come in nicely. But yes, never, EVER, brush dry curls/waves. Poor boy, maybe he’ll want to be a clown for Halloween? A little colored hairspray and voila!

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      • Might also guarantee that he’ll not forgive you til he’s 18 πŸ˜› Funny as hell though. Actually, we got little’s guy’s costume idea from his hooded towel (it’s a frog towel). He was the frog prince! Cost about 6 bucks and a little sewing on my part.

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  12. Isn’t it always the case that those with straight hair want waves while those with waves want straight hair =P…oriental hair is typically straight so mine’s does nothing but lay down on me xD.

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  13. I have super, super curly hair which my mom had no idea what to do with and did frequently brush my hair when dry. Ugh. I feel for your poor son. I don’t think my future kids will have any chance at straight hair. Fortunately mama will know how to help them manage it (not that you can really ever fully manage curly hair).

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  14. When my mom used to brush my rats nest head of curly hair I would tell her “Stop it! Those aren’t tangles, they’re beautiful curls!”. We forgive, Ionia, but we never forget! πŸ™‚

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  15. Ha! I feel for him! Up until my mom actually let me do my own hair, I could only choose between braids or the poof. I’ve also learned to fear brushes lol

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  16. Bahaha! My mom would do the same thing, except she would do it many times! She loved playing with my curly hair. I’m 25 now and I absolutely love my curly hair, but myself and many other guys like me, hated our curly hair while growing up. Mostly do to peer pressure, because kids would love to make fun of us. Your son will may or may not end up like myself, but if he grows up not liking it don’t blame yourself. My mom loved my hair and it took me a while to love it too, so it goes to show that sometimes somethings are out of your control.

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